holding my heart

about knowing that you made the right decision but somehow regretting it.

You were holding my heart

while my head laid on your shoulder,

I could’ve spent forever there with you,

I could’ve reached and seal your lips with a

tender kiss.

But I didn’t,

And you didn’t

reach out to me when I was feeling sick,

and I felt it,

all the critics.

And I just couldn’t bear the sound of their voices telling me that I was wrong,

and I could’ve started crying right in that moment

but I decided to stay strong.

---

The fear of rejection

was never leaving me

and I wanted it to leave and not you.

I just wanted you to stay.

I still want you to stay.

But I can’t look into your eyes

and see all the answers that I crave

(they won’t be the ones I desire anyway).

---

You were holding my heart

while my head rested on your chest,

I could’ve spent forever there with you,

I could’ve reached and calm your rapid beating heart.

It was the same as mine.

You and I are similar,

but we are not the same

because you are not ashamed,

and lately I am.

I can’t find the reason why I ran,

I am always trying,

but not hard enough for the things that I want.

---

I miss you,

I miss what could’ve been.

I guess one day

we could spend forever together

but for now

I live in between regrets.

(deep down I know I made the right decision).

Lots of love,

Adriana <3